Me, At the End

Wow, this is blog number 36. Our final blog. It's hard to believe that this is the end. It would be a little easier to bare if this was simply the end of this Philosophy class. But this is not just the end of my Philosophy class, this is the end of my senior year, the end of being a Whitney Young student, the end of being a high school student, and pretty much the end of being considered a teen with it's traditional nonchalantness and it's menial and trivial anecdotes, excuses, punishments and freedoms. It is the beginning of being treated and being seen as an adult and while it opens up many freedoms, it shuts out many others. Yes, this is the end, yet it's the beginning, and while I'm scared of the possibility of failure, I have no choice but to try, which is why I'm eager at the same time.

This year has been a big transition for me. I've received some of the biggest challenges that I've ever had in all four of my high school years, I've received some of the worst grades, I've done better than I thought that I could do and worse in some areas. This has been the hardest year for me emotionally, mentally and physically. I'm glad that it's almost over (as far as school goes), but it scares me because I've done horribly in certain areas and it scares me that I might do just as bad in college. I look forward to college simply because it deals with many things that I actually find interesting, but it also has other, less appealing aspects.

In the end, I know that I'll have less distractions and more time in the future to focus on the things that I'll need to focus on. I just hope that this is true. I believe this year has been a big test as to the willingness that I have and the dedication that I possess. I've learned that I am simply motivated, not by a grade, but how interesting I find the course material and how the instructor presents the information. Overall, I'll have to overcome any obstacles that I find challenging in my future if I plan to live a successful life, like I imagine.